He said, "I was fine till yesterday, suddenly, some fears set in." And his therapist said, “it looks like you might have OCD.”
It is a bright sunny day, and yet there is a feeling of being lost. Life, in general, seems uncertain. The mind only thinks that something horrible is going to happen. While the heart says, think of something positive, there is doubt if that is even possible.
I happen to read the diary of a person with OCD, and he wrote, "I drive and think I might hurt someone while driving every day. Yet, I don’t stop driving. The outcome is relative, but my effort is absolute. These thoughts bother me even when I am not driving. Sometimes I think, would it be a privilege to be psychotic? I’d be living in a world of my own, at least less ego-dystonic as mine.”
There is nothing more uncertain than living. It isn’t just about life or death that is uncertain. There is so much uncertainty every day. Every morning one plans a set of tasks to be completed by the end of the day. However, what if the plan does not go as desired. The faithful aspect of uncertainty comes with a demanding question, ‘what if?’
Sometimes people can overcome this question by not focussing on this aspect of uncertainty. They let their focus remain on the more certain options available. There are people with so many different mental illnesses. When I come to think of them, I can only be sure to sympathize with them. Not empathize. I possibly cannot imagine how difficult it is for someone with anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) to live with uncertainty.
Anxiety is not just being nervous, OCD is not just the order of things, and OCPD is unknown to the world.
Mental illnesses are not just labels used to categorize anyone as disabled. Mental Illnesses are real-time experiences, feelings, and situations of people who are able and capable.
Mental health will always remain vulnerable, that is certain.
#mentalhealth #mentalillness #OCD #experiences #obsessions #thoughts #compulsion #anecdotes